Enter the three Bawds
Well, I had rather than twice the worth of her
she had ne'er come here.
Fie, fie upon her! She's able to freeze the god
Priapus and undo a whole generation. We must either
get her ravished or be rid of her. When she should
do for clients her fitment and do me the kindness of our
profession, she has me her quirks, her reasons, her
master reasons, her prayers, her knees, that she would
make a puritan of the devil if he should cheapen a kiss
Faith, I must ravish her, or she'll disfurnish us
of all our cavalleria and make our swearers priests.
Now, the pox upon her green-sickness for me!
Faith, there's no way to be rid on't but by the way
to the pox. Here comes the Lord Lysimachus disguised.
We should have both lord and lown if the peevish
baggage would but give way to customers.
How now, how a dozen of virginities?
Now, the gods to bless your honour!
I am glad to see your honour in good health.
You may so; 'tis the better for you that
your resorters stand upon sound legs. How now, wholesome
iniquity have you, that a man may deal withal and
defy the surgeon?
We have here one, sir, if she would – but there
never came her like in Mytilene.
If she'd do the deeds of darkness, thou
Your honour knows what 'tis to say well enough.
Well, call forth, call forth.
For flesh and blood, sir, white and red, you shall
see a rose. And she were a rose indeed, if she had but –
O, sir, I can be modest.
That dignifies the renown of a bawd no
less than it gives a good report to a number to be chaste.
Here comes that which grows to the stalk, never
plucked yet, I can assure you.
Enter Boult with Marina
Is she not a fair creature?
Faith she would serve after a long voyage
at sea. Well, there's for you.
He gives her money
I beseech your honour, give me leave a word, and
I'll have done presently.
I beseech you, do.
First, I would have you note this is an
I desire to find him so, that I may worthily note
Next, he's the governor of this country, and a man
whom I am bound to.
If he govern the country, you are bound to him
indeed, but how honourable he is in that I know not.
Pray you, without any more virginal fencing, will
you use him kindly? He will line your apron with gold.
What he will do graciously, I will thankfully
Ha' you done?
My lord, she's not paced yet; you must take some
pace (v.) 1
[horse-training] break in, teach one paces, properly train
pains to work her to your manage. Come, we will leave
manage (n.) 1
management, handling, control [especially of a horse, as a result of training]
his honour and her together. Go thy ways.
Exeunt, Pandar, Bawd, and Boult
Now, pretty one, how long have you been
at this trade?
What trade, sir?
Why, I cannot name it but I shall offend.
I cannot be offended with my trade. Please you
to name it.
How long have you been of this profession?
E'er since I can remember.
Did you go to't so young? Were you a
gamester at five, or at seven?
gamester (n.) 2
one drawn to amorous sport, one who plays the game, prostitute
Earlier too, sir, if now I be one.
Why, the house you dwell in proclaims you
to be a creature of sale.
Do you know this house to be a place of such
resort, and will come into't? I hear say you're of
honourable parts and are the governor of this place.
part (n.) 1
quality, attribute, gift, accomplishment [of mind or body]
Why, hath your principal made known
unto you who I am?
Who is my principal?
Why, your herb-woman; she that sets
seeds and roots of shame and iniquity. O, you have
heard something of my power, and so stand aloof for
more serious wooing. But I protest to thee, pretty one,
my authority shall not see thee, or else look friendly
upon thee. Come, bring me to some private place.
If you were born to honour, show it now;
If put upon you, make the judgement good
That thought you worthy of it.
How's this? How's this? Some more. Be sage.
That am a maid, though most ungentle fortune
Have placed me in this sty, where since I came
Diseases have been sold dearer than physic –
That the gods
Would set me free from this unhallowed place,
Though they did change me to the meanest bird
That flies i'th' purer air!
I did not think thou couldst have spoke so well,
Ne'er dreamt thou couldst.
Had I brought hither a corrupted mind,
Thy speech had altered it. Hold, here's gold for thee.
Persever in that clear way thou goest,
And the gods strengthen thee.
The good gods preserve you.
For me, be you thoughten
That I came with no ill intent; for to me
The very doors and windows savour vilely.
Fare thee well. Thou art a piece of virtue, and
I doubt not but thy training hath been noble.
Hold, here's more gold for thee.
A curse upon him, die he like a thief,
That robs thee of thy goodness! If thou dost
Hear from me, it shall be for thy good.
I beseech your honour, one piece for me.
Avaunt, thou damned door-keeper!
Your house, but for this virgin that doth prop it,
Would sink and overwhelm you. Away!
How's this? We must take another course with
you. If your peevish chastity, which is not worth a
peevish (adj.) 2
obstinate, perverse, self-willed [contrast modern sense of ‘irritable, morose’]
breakfast in the cheapest country under the cope, shall
undo a whole household, let me be gelded like a spaniel.
Come your ways.
Whither would you have me?
I must have your maidenhead taken off, or the
common hangman shall execute it. Come your ways.
We'll have no more gentlemen driven away. Come your
ways, I say.
Enter Pandar and Bawd
How now, what's the matter?
Worse and worse, mistress. She has here spoken
holy words to the Lord Lysimachus.
She makes our profession as it were to stink afore
the face of the gods.
Marry, hang her up for ever!
The nobleman would have dealt with her like a
nobleman, and she sent him away as cold as a snowball,
saying his prayers too.
Boult, take her away. Use her at thy pleasure.
Crack the glass of her virginity, and make the rest
An if she were a thornier piece of ground than she
is, she shall be ploughed.
Hark, hark, you gods!
She conjures! Away with her! Would she had never
come within my doors! Marry, hang you! She's born to
undo us. Will you not go the way of womenkind?
Marry come up, my dish of chastity with rosemary and
bay (n.) 3
leaf of the bay-tree [used as a herb; symbol of triumph]
Exit Pandar and Bawd
Come, mistress, come your way with me.
Whither wilt thou have me?
To take from you the jewel you hold so dear.
Prithee tell me one thing first.
Come now, your one thing.
What canst thou wish thine enemy to be?
Why, I could wish him to be my master, or rather
Neither of these are so bad as thou art,
Since they do better thee in their command.
Thou holdest a place
For which the pained'st fiend of hell
Would not in reputation change. Thou art
The damned doorkeeper to every custrel
That comes inquiring for his Tib.
[type name for] strumpet, harlot, whore
To the choleric fisting of every rogue
Thy ear is liable. Thy food is such
As hath been belched on by infected lungs.
What would you have me do? go to the wars,
would you? where a man may serve seven years for the
loss of a leg, and have not money enough in the end to
buy him a wooden one?
Do anything but this
Thou doest. Empty old receptacles
Or common shores of filth;
Serve by indenture to the common hangman.
Any of these ways are yet better than this,
For what thou professest, a baboon, could he speak,
Would own a name too dear. That the gods
Would safely deliver me from this place!
Here, here's gold for thee.
If that thy master would gain by me,
Proclaim that I can sing, weave, sew, and dance,
With other virtues which I'll keep from boast,
And I will undertake all these to teach.
I doubt not but this populous city will
Yield many scholars.
But can you teach all this you speak of?
Prove that I cannot, take me home again
And prostitute me to the basest groom
That doth frequent your house.
Well, I will see what I can do for thee. If I can
place thee, I will.
But amongst honest women.
Faith, my acquaintance lies little amongst them.
But since my master and mistress hath bought you,
there's no going but by their consent. Therefore I will
make them acquainted with your purpose, and I doubt
not but I shall find them tractable enough. Come, I'll
do for thee what I can. Come your ways.