The Taming of the Shrew

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Original text
Act V, Scene I
Enter Biondello, Lucentio and Bianea,
Gremio is out before.

Biond.
Softly and swiftly sir, for the Priest is ready.

Luc.
I flie Biondello; but they may chance to neede
thee at home, therefore leaue vs.
Exit.

Biond.
Nay faith, Ile see the Church a your backe,
and then come backe to my mistris as soone as I can.

Gre.
I maruaile Cambio comes not all this while.
Enter Petruchio, Kate, Vincentio, Grumio
with Attendants.

Petr.
Sir heres the doore, this is Lucentios house,
My Fathers beares more toward the Market-place,
Thither must I, and here I leaue you sir.

Vin.
You shall not choose but drinke before you go,
I thinke I shall command your welcome here;
And by all likelihood some cheere is toward.
Knock.

Grem.
They're busie within, you were best knocke lowder.
Pedant lookes out of the window.

Ped
What's he that knockes as he would beat downe the
gate?

Vin.
Is Signior Lucentio within sir?

Ped.
He's within sir, but not to be spoken withall.

Vinc.
What if a man bring him a hundred pound or
two to make merrie withall.

Ped.
Keepe your hundred pounds to your selfe, hee shall
neede none so long as I liue.

Petr.
Nay, I told you your sonne was well beloued
in Padua: doe you heare sir, to leaue friuolous circumstances,
I pray you tell signior Lucentio that his Father is
come from Pisa, and is here at the doore to speake with
him.

Ped.
Thou liest his Father is come from Padua, and
here looking out at the window.

Vin.
Art thou his father?

Ped.
I sir, so his mother saies, if I may beleeue her.

Petr.
Why how now gentleman:
why this is flat knauerie to take vpon you another mans
name.

Peda.
Lay hands on the villaine, I beleeue a meanes to
cosen some bodie in this Citie vnder my countenance.
Enter Biondello.

Bio.
I haue seene them in the Church together,
God send'em good shipping: but who is here?
mine old Master Uincentio: now wee are vndone and
brought to nothing.

Uin.

Come hither crackhempe.

Bion.
I hope I may choose Sir.

Vin.
Come hither you rogue, what haue you forgot
mee?

Biond.
Forgot you, no sir: I could not forget you,
for I neuer saw you before in all my life.

Uinc.
What, you notorious villaine, didst thou neuer
see thy Mistris father, Vincentio?

Bion.
What my old worshipfull old master? yes
marie sir see where he lookes out of the window.

Uin.
Ist so indeede.
He beates Biondello.

Bion.
Helpe, helpe, helpe, here's a mad man
will murder me.

Pedan.
Helpe, sonne, helpe signior Baptista.

Petr.
Pree the Kate let's stand aside and see the
end of this controuersie.
Enter Pedant with seruants, Baptista,
Tranio.

Tra.
Sir, what are you that offer to beate my seruant?

Vinc.
What am I sir: nay what are you sir: oh
immortall Goddes: oh fine villaine, a silken doublet, a veluet
hose, a scarlet cloake, and a copataine hat: oh I am vndone,
I am vndone: while I plaie the good husband at home,
my sonne and my seruant spend all at the vniuersitie.

Tra.
How now, what's the matter?

Bapt.
What is the man lunaticke?

Tra.
Sir, you seeme a sober ancient Gentleman by your
habit: but your words shew you a mad man: why sir,
what cernes it you, if I weare Pearle and gold: I thank my
good Father, I am able to maintaine it.

Vin.
Thy father: oh villaine, he is a Saile-maker in
Bergamo.

Bap.
You mistake sir, you mistake sir, praie what
do you thinke is his name?

Vin.
His name, as if I knew not his name: I haue
brought him vp euer since he was three yeeres old, and
his name is Tronio.

Ped.
Awaie, awaie mad asse, his name is Lucentio, and
he is mine onelie sonne and heire to the Lands of me signior
Vincentio.

Ven.
Lucentio: oh he hath murdred his Master;
laie hold on him I charge you in the Dukes name: oh
my sonne, my sonne: tell me thou villaine, where is my son
Lucentio?

Tra.
Call forth an officer:

Carrie this mad knaue to the Iaile: father Baptista, I
charge you see that hee be forth comming.

Vinc.
Carrie me to the Iaile?

Gre.
Staie officer, he shall not go to prison.

Bap.
Talke not signior Gremio: I saie he shall goe to
prison.

Gre.
Take heede signior Baptista, least you be coni-catcht
in this businesse: I dare sweare this is the right
Vincentio.

Ped.
Sweare if thou dar'st.

Gre.
Naie, I dare not sweare it.

Tran.
Then thou wert best saie that I am not Lucentio.

Gre.
Yes, I know thee to be signior Lucentio.

Bap.
Awaie with the dotard, to the Iaile with him.

Vin.
Thus strangers may be haild and abusd: oh
monstrous villaine.
Enter Biondello, Lucentio and Bianeu.

Bion.
Oh we are spoil'd, and yonder he is, denie
him, forsweare him, or else we are all vndone.

Luc.
Pardon sweete father. Kneele.

Vin.
Liues my sweete sonne?
Exit Biondello, Tranio and Pedant as fast as may be.

Bian.
Pardon deere father.

Bap.
How hast thou offended,
where is Lucentio?

Luc.
Here's Lucentio,
right sonne to the right Uincentio,
That haue by marriage made thy daughter mine,
While counterfeit supposes bleer'd thine eine.

Gre.
Here's packing with a witnesse to deceiue vs all.

Vin.
Where is that damned villaine Tranio,
That fac'd and braued me in this matter so?

Bup.
Why, tell me is not this my Cambio?

Bian.
Cambio is chang'd into Lucentio.

Luc.
Loue wrought these miracles. Biancas loue
Made me exchange my state with Tranio,
While he did beare my countenance in the towne,
And happilie I haue arriued at the last
Vnto the wished hauen of my blisse:
What Tranio did, my selfe enforst him to;
Then pardon him sweete Father for my sake.

Uin.
Ile slit the villaines nose that would haue sent
me to the Iaile.

Bap.
But doe you heare sir, haue you
married my daughter without asking my good will?

Vin.
Feare not Baptista, we will content you, goe to:
but I will in to be reueng'd for this villanie.
Exit.

Bap.
And I to sound the depth of this knauerie.
Exit.

Luc.
Looke not pale Bianca, thy father will not
frown.
Exeunt.

Gre.
My cake is dough, hbut Ile in among the rest,
Out of hope of all, but my share of the feast.

Kate.
Husband let's follow, to see the end of this
adoe.

Petr.
First kisse me Kate, and we will.

Kate.
What in the midst of the streete?

Petr.
What art thou asham'd of me?

Kate.
Mo sir, God forbid, but asham'd to kisse.

Petr.
Why then let's home againe:
Come Sirra let's awaie.

Kate.
Nay, I will giue thee a kisse,
now praie thee Loue staie.

Petr.
Is not this well? come my sweete Kate.
Better once then neuer, for neuer to late.
Exeunt.
Original text
Act V, Scene II
Enter Baptista, Vincentio, Gremio,
the Pedant, Lucentio, and Bianca. Tranio, Biondello
Grumio, and Widdow:
The Seruingmen with Tranio
bringing in a Banquet.

Luc.
At last, though long, our iarring notes agree,
And time it is when raging warre is come,
To smile at scapes and perils ouerblowne:
My faire Bianca bid my father welcome,
While I with selfesame kindnesse welcome thine:
Brother Petruchio, sister Katerina,
And thou Hortentio with thy louing Widdow:
Feast with the best, and welcome to my house,
My Banket is to close our stomakes vp
After our great good cheere: praie you sit downe,
For now we sit to chat as well as eate.

Petr.
Nothing but sit and sit, and eate and eate.

Bap.
Padua affords this kindnesse, sonne Petruchio.

Petr.
Padua affords nothing but what is kinde.

Hor.
For both our sakes I would that word were true.

Pet.
Now for my life Hortentio feares his Widow.

Wid.
Then neuer trust me if I be affeard.

Petr.
You are verie sencible, and yet you misse my sence:
I meane Hortentio is afeard of you.

Wid.
He that is giddie thinks the world turns round.

Petr.
Roundlie replied.

Kat.
Mistris, how meane you that?

Wid.
Thus I conceiue by him.

Petr.
Conceiues by me, how likes Hortentio that?

Hor.
My Widdow saies, thus she conceiues her tale.

Petr.
Verie well mended: kisse him for that good Widdow.

Kat.
He that is giddie thinkes the world turnes round,
I praie you tell me what you meant by that.

Wid.
Your housband being troubled with a shrew,
Measures my husbands sorrow by his woe:
And now you know my meaning.

Kate.
A verie meane meaning.

Wid.
Right, I meane you.

Kat.
And I am meane indeede, respecting you.

Petr.
To her Kate.

Hor.
To her Widdow.

Petr.
A hundred marks, my Kate does put her down.

Hor.
That's my office

Petr.
Spoke like an Officer: ha to the lad.
Drinkes to Hortentio.

Bap.
How likes Gremio these quicke witted folkes?

Gre.
Beleeue me sir, they But together well.

Bian.
Head, and but an hastie witted bodie,
Would say your Head and But were head and horne.

Vin.
I Mistris Bride, hath that awakened you?

Bian.
I, but not frighted me, therefore Ile sleepe againe.

Petr.
Nay that you shall not since you haue begun:
Haue at you for a better iest or too.

Bian.
Am I your Bird, I meane to shift my bush,
And then pursue me as you draw your Bow.
You are welcome all.
Exit Bianca.

Petr.
She hath preuented me, here signior Tranio,
This bird you aim'd at, though you hit her not,
Therefore a health to all that shot and mist.

Tri.
Oh sir, Lucentio slipt me like his Gray-hound,
Which runs himselfe, and catches for his Master.

Petr.
A good swift simile, but something currish.

Tra.
'Tis well sir that you hunted for your selfe:
'Tis thought your Deere does hold you at a baie.

Bap.
Oh, oh Petruchio, Tranio hits you now.

Luc.
I thanke thee for that gird good Tranio.

Hor.
Confesse, confesse, hath he not hit you here?

Petr.
A has a little gald me I confesse:
And as the Iest did glaunce awaie from me,
'Tis ten to one it maim'd you too out right.

Bap.
Now in good sadnesse sonne Petruchio,
I thinke thou hast the veriest shrew of all.

Petr.
Well, I say no: and therefore sir assurance,
Let's each one send vnto his wife,
And he whose wife is most obedient,
To come at first when he doth send for her,
Shall win the wager which we will propose.

Hort.
Content, what's the wager?

Luc.
Twentie crownes.

Petr.
Twentie crownes,
Ile venture so much of my Hawke or Hound,
But twentie times so much vpon my Wife.

Luc.
A hundred then.

Hor.
Content.

Petr.
A match, 'tis done.

Hor.
Who shall begin?

Luc.
That will I.
Goe Biondello, bid your Mistris come to me.

Bio.
Igoe.
Exit.

Bap.
Sonne, Ile be your halfe, Bianca comes.

Luc.
Ile haue no halues: Ile beare it all my selfe.
Enter Biondello.
How now, what newes?

Bio.
Sir, my Mistris sends you word
That she is busie, and she cannot come.

Petr.
How? she's busie, and she cannot come:
is that an answere?

Gre.
I, and a kinde one too:
Praie God sir your wife send you not a worse.

Petr.
I hope better.

Hor.
Sirra Biondello, goe and intreate my wife to
come to me forthwith.
Exit. Bion.

Pet.
Oh ho, intreate her,
nay then shee must needes come.

Hor.
I am affraid sir,
doe what you can / Yours will not be entreated:
Enter Biondello.
Now, where's my wife?

Bion.
She saies you haue some goodly Iest in hand,
She will not come: she bids you come to her.

Petr.
Worse and worse, she will not come: / Oh vilde,
intollerable, not to be indur'd:
Sirra Grumio, goe to your Mistris,
Say I command her come to me.
Exit.

Hor.
I know her answere.

Pet.
What?

Hor.
She will not.

Petr.
The fouler fortune mine, and there an end.
Enter Katerina.

Bap.
Now by my hollidam here comes Katerina.

Kat.
What is your will sir, that you send for me?

Petr.
Where is your sister, and Hortensios wife?

Kate.
They sit conferring by the Parler fire.

Petr.
Goe fetch them hither, if they denie to come,
Swinge me them soundly forth vnto their husbands:
Away I say, and bring them hither straight.

Luc.
Here is a wonder, if you talke of a wonder.

Hor.
And so it is: I wonder what it boads.

Petr.
Marrie peace it boads, and loue, and quiet life,
An awfull rule, and right supremicie:
And to be short, what not, that's sweete and happie.

Bap.
Now faire befall thee good Petruchio;
The wager thou hast won, and I will adde
Vnto their losses twentie thousand crownes,
Another dowrie to another daughter,
For she is chang'd as she had neuer bin.

Petr.
Nay, I will win my wager better yet,
And show more signe of her obedience,
Her new built vertue and obedience.
Enter Kate, Bianca, and Widdow.
See where she comes, and brings your froward Wiues
As prisoners to her womanlie perswasion:
Katerine, that Cap of yours becomes you not,
Off with that bable, throw it vnderfoote.

Wid.
Lord let me neuer haue a cause to sigh,
Till I be brought to such a sillie passe.

Bian.
Fie what a foolish dutie call you this?

Luc.
I would your dutie were as foolish too:
The wisdome of your dutie faire Bianca,
Hath cost me fiue hundred crownes since supper time.

Bian.
The more foole you for laying on my dutie.

Pet.
Katherine I charge thee tell these head-strong women,
what dutie they doe owe their Lords and husbands.

Wid.
Come, come, your mocking: we will haue no telling.

Pet.
Come on I say, and first begin with her.

Wid.
She shall not.

Pet.
I say she shall, and first begin with her.

Kate.
Fie, fie, vnknit that thretaning vnkinde brow,
And dart not scornefull glances from those eies,
To wound thy Lord, thy King, thy Gouernour.
It blots thy beautie, as frosts doe bite the Meads,
Confounds thy fame, as whirlewinds shake faire budds,
And in no sence is meete or amiable.
A woman mou'd, is like a fountaine troubled,
Muddie, ill seeming, thicke, bereft of beautie,
And while it is so, none so dry or thirstie
Will daigne to sip, or touch one drop of it.
Thy husband is thy Lord, thy life, thy keeper,
Thy head, thy soueraigne: One that cares for thee,
And for thy maintenance. Commits his body
To painfull labour, both by sea and land:
To watch the night in stormes, the day in cold,
Whil'st thou ly'st warme at home, secure and safe,
And craues no other tribute at thy hands,
But loue, faire lookes, and true obedience;
Too little payment for so great a debt.
Such dutie as the subiect owes the Prince,
Euen such a woman oweth to her husband:
And when she is froward, peeuish, sullen, sowre,
And not obedient to his honest will,
What is she but a foule contending Rebell,
And gracelesse Traitor to her louing Lord?
I am asham'd that women are so simple,
To offer warre, where they should kneele for peace:
Or seeke for rule, supremacie, and sway,
When they are bound to serue, loue, and obay.
Why are our bodies soft, and weake, and smooth,
Vnapt to toyle and trouble in the world,
But that our soft conditions, and our harts,
Should well agree with our externall parts?
Come, come, you froward and vnable wormes,
My minde hath bin as bigge as one of yours,
My heart as great, my reason haplie more,
To bandie word for word, and frowne for frowne;
But now I see our Launces are but strawes:
Our strength as weake, our weakenesse past compare,
That seeming to be most, which we indeed least are.
Then vale your stomackes, for it is no boote,
And place your hands below your husbands foote:
In token of which dutie, if he please,
My hand is readie, may it do him ease.

Pet.
Why there's a wench: Come on, and kisse mee Kate.

Luc.
Well go thy waies olde Lad for thou shalt ha't.

Vin.
Tis a good hearing, when children are toward.

Luc.
But a harsh hearing, when women are froward,

Pet.
Come Kate, weee'le to bed,
We three are married, but you two are sped.
'Twas I wonne the wager, though you hit the white,
And being a winner, God giue you good night.
Exit Petruchio

Horten.
Now goe thy wayes, thou hast tam'd a curst Shrow.

Luc.
Tis a wonder, by your leaue, she wil be tam'd so.
Modern text
Act V, Scene I
Enter Biondello, Lucentio as himself, and Bianca.
Gremio is out before

BIONDELLO
Softly and swiftly, sir, for the priest is ready.

LUCENTIO
I fly, Biondello. But they may chance to need
thee at home, therefore leave us.
Exeunt Lucentio and Bianca

BIONDELLO
Nay, faith, I'll see the church a your back,
and then come back to my master's as soon as I can.
Exit

GREMIO
I marvel Cambio comes not all this while.
Enter Petruchio, Katherina, Vincentio and Grumio,
with attendants

PETRUCHIO
Sir, here's the door, this is Lucentio's house.
My father's bears more toward the market-place.
Thither must I, and here I leave you, sir.

VINCENTIO
You shall not choose but drink before you go.
I think I shall command your welcome here,
And by all likelihood some cheer is toward.
He knocks

GREMIO
They're busy within. You were best knock louder.
More knocking
Pedant looks out of the window

PEDANT
What's he that knocks as he would beat down the
gate?

VINCENTIO
Is Signor Lucentio within, sir?

PEDANT
He's within, sir, but not to be spoken withal.

VINCENTIO
What if a man bring him a hundred pound or
two to make merry withal?

PEDANT
Keep your hundred pounds to yourself. He shall
need none so long as I live.

PETRUCHIO
Nay, I told you your son was well beloved
in Padua. Do you hear, sir? To leave frivolous circumstances,
I pray you tell Signor Lucentio that his father is
come from Pisa, and is here at the door to speak with
him.

PEDANT
Thou liest. His father is come from Mantua, and
here looking out at the window.

VINCENTIO
Art thou his father?

PEDANT
Ay sir, so his mother says, if I may believe her.

PETRUCHIO
(to Vincentio)
Why how now, gentleman!
Why, this is flat knavery, to take upon you another man's
name.

PEDANT
Lay hands on the villain. I believe a' means to
cozen somebody in this city under my countenance.
Enter Biondello

BIONDELLO
(aside) I have seen them in the church together.
God send 'em good shipping! But who is here?
Mine old master Vincentio! Now we are undone and
brought to nothing.

VINCENTIO
(seeing Biondello)
Come hither, crack-hemp.

BIONDELLO
I hope I may choose, sir.

VINCENTIO
Come hither, you rogue. What, have you forgot
me?

BIONDELLO
Forgot you? No, sir. I could not forget you,
for I never saw you before in all my life.

VINCENTIO
What, you notorious villain, didst thou never
see thy master's father, Vincentio?

BIONDELLO
What, my old worshipful old master? Yes,
marry, sir – see where he looks out of the window.

VINCENTIO
Is't so, indeed?
He beats Biondello

BIONDELLO
Help, help, help! Here's a madman will
murder me.
Exit

PEDANT
Help, son! Help, Signor Baptista!
Exit from the window

PETRUCHIO
Prithee, Kate, let's stand aside and see the
end of this controversy.
They stand aside
Enter Pedant below, with Servants, Baptista, and
Tranio

TRANIO
Sir, what are you that offer to beat my servant?

VINCENTIO
What am I, sir? Nay, what are you, sir? O
immortal gods! O fine villain! A silken doublet, a velvet
hose, a scarlet cloak, and a copatain hat! O, I am undone,
I am undone! While I play the good husband at home,
my son and my servant spend all at the university.

TRANIO
How now, what's the matter?

BAPTISTA
What, is the man lunatic?

TRANIO
Sir, you seem a sober ancient gentleman by your
habit, but your words show you a madman. Why, sir,
what 'cerns it you if I wear pearl and gold? I thank my
good father, I am able to maintain it.

VINCENTIO
Thy father? O villain, he is a sail-maker in
Bergamo.

BAPTISTA
You mistake, sir, you mistake, sir. Pray, what
do you think is his name?

VINCENTIO
His name? As if I knew not his name! I have
brought him up ever since he was three years old, and
his name is Tranio.

PEDANT
Away, away, mad ass! His name is Lucentio, and
he is mine only son, and heir to the lands of me, Signor
Vincentio.

VINCENTIO
Lucentio? O, he hath murdered his master!
Lay hold on him, I charge you, in the Duke's name. O,
my son, my son! Tell me, thou villain, where is my son
Lucentio?

TRANIO
Call forth an officer.
Enter an Officer
Carry this mad knave to the gaol. Father Baptista, I
charge you see that he be forthcoming.

VINCENTIO
Carry me to the gaol?

GREMIO
Stay, officer. He shall not go to prison.

BAPTISTA
Talk not, Signor Gremio. I say he shall go to
prison.

GREMIO
Take heed, Signor Baptista, lest you be cony-catched
in this business. I dare swear this is the right
Vincentio.

PEDANT
Swear if thou dar'st.

GREMIO
Nay, I dare not swear it.

TRANIO
Then thou wert best say that I am not Lucentio.

GREMIO
Yes, I know thee to be Signor Lucentio.

BAPTISTA
Away with the dotard, to the gaol with him!

VINCENTIO
Thus strangers may be hailed and abused. O
monstrous villain!
Enter Biondello, with Lucentio and Bianca

BIONDELLO
O, we are spoiled, and yonder he is! Deny
him, forswear him, or else we are all undone.

LUCENTIO
(kneeling)
Pardon, sweet father.

VINCENTIO
Lives my sweet son?
Exeunt Biondello, Tranio and Pedant, as fast as may be

BIANCA
Pardon, dear father.

BAPTISTA
How hast thou offended?
Where is Lucentio?

LUCENTIO
Here's Lucentio,
Right son to the right Vincentio,
That have by marriage made thy daughter mine,
While counterfeit supposes bleared thine eyne.

GREMIO
Here's packing, with a witness, to deceive us all.

VINCENTIO
Where is that damned villain, Tranio,
That faced and braved me in this matter so?

BAPTISTA
Why, tell me, is not this my Cambio?

BIANCA
Cambio is changed into Lucentio.

LUCENTIO
Love wrought these miracles. Bianca's love
Made me exchange my state with Tranio,
While he did bear my countenance in the town,
And happily I have arrived at last
Unto the wished haven of my bliss.
What Tranio did, myself enforced him to;
Then pardon him, sweet father, for my sake.

VINCENTIO
I'll slit the villain's nose, that would have sent
me to the gaol.

BAPTISTA
(to Lucentio)
But do you hear, sir? Have you
married my daughter without asking my good will?

VINCENTIO
Fear not, Baptista; we will content you, go to.
But I will in to be revenged for this villainy.
Exit

BAPTISTA
And I to sound the depth of this knavery.
Exit

LUCENTIO
Look not pale, Bianca – thy father will not
frown.
Exeunt Lucentio and Bianca

GREMIO
My cake is dough, but I'll in among the rest,
Out of hope of all but my share of the feast.
Exit

KATHERINA
Husband, let's follow to see the end of this
ado.

PETRUCHIO
First kiss me, Kate, and we will.

KATHERINA
What, in the midst of the street?

PETRUCHIO
What, art thou ashamed of me?

KATHERINA
No, sir, God forbid – but ashamed to kiss.

PETRUCHIO
Why, then, let's home again.
(to Grumio) Come, sirrah, let's away.

KATHERINA
Nay, I will give thee a kiss.
She kisses him
Now pray thee, love, stay.

PETRUCHIO
Is not this well? Come, my sweet Kate.
Better once than never, for never too late.
Exeunt
Modern text
Act V, Scene II
Enter Baptista with Vincentio, Gremio with the
Pedant, Lucentio with Bianca, Petruchio with
Katherina, Hortensio with the Widow; followed by
Tranio, Biondello, and Grumio, with the Servingmen
bringing in a banquet

LUCENTIO
At last, though long, our jarring notes agree,
And time it is when raging war is done
To smile at scapes and perils overblown.
My fair Bianca, bid my father welcome,
While I with selfsame kindness welcome thine.
Brother Petruchio, sister Katherina,
And thou, Hortensio, with thy loving widow,
Feast with the best, and welcome to my house.
My banquet is to close our stomachs up
After our great good cheer. Pray you, sit down,
For now we sit to chat as well as eat.
They sit

PETRUCHIO
Nothing but sit and sit, and eat and eat!

BAPTISTA
Padua affords this kindness, son Petruchio.

PETRUCHIO
Padua affords nothing but what is kind.

HORTENSIO
For both our sakes I would that word were true.

PETRUCHIO
Now, for my life, Hortensio fears his widow.

WIDOW
Then never trust me if I be afeard.

PETRUCHIO
You are very sensible, and yet you miss my sense:
I mean Hortensio is afeard of you.

WIDOW
He that is giddy thinks the world turns round.

PETRUCHIO
Roundly replied.

KATHERINA
Mistress, how mean you that?

WIDOW
Thus I conceive by him.

PETRUCHIO
Conceives by me! How likes Hortensio that?

HORTENSIO
My widow says thus she conceives her tale.

PETRUCHIO
Very well mended. Kiss him for that, good widow.

KATHERINA
‘ He that is giddy thinks the world turns round ’ –
I pray you tell me what you meant by that.

WIDOW
Your husband, being troubled with a shrew,
Measures my husband's sorrow by his woe.
And now you know my meaning,

KATHERINA
A very mean meaning.

WIDOW
Right, I mean you.

KATHERINA
And I am mean, indeed, respecting you.

PETRUCHIO
To her, Kate!

HORTENSIO
To her, widow!

PETRUCHIO
A hundred marks, my Kate does put her down.

HORTENSIO
That's my office.

PETRUCHIO
Spoke like an officer – ha' to thee, lad.
He drinks to Hortensio

BAPTISTA
How likes Gremio these quick-witted folks?

GREMIO
Believe me, sir, they butt together well.

BIANCA
Head and butt! An hasty-witted body
Would say your head and butt were head and horn.

VINCENTIO
Ay, mistress bride, hath that awakened you?

BIANCA
Ay, but not frighted me, therefore I'll sleep again.

PETRUCHIO
Nay, that you shall not. Since you have begun,
Have at you for a bitter jest or two.

BIANCA
Am I your bird? I mean to shift my bush,
And then pursue me as you draw your bow.
You are welcome all.
Exeunt Bianca, Katherina, and Widow

PETRUCHIO
She hath prevented me. Here, Signor Tranio,
This bird you aimed at, though you hit her not –
Therefore a health to all that shot and missed.

TRANIO
O sir, Lucentio slipped me like his greyhound,
Which runs himself, and catches for his master.

PETRUCHIO
A good swift simile, but something currish.

TRANIO
'Tis well, sir, that you hunted for yourself.
'Tis thought your deer does hold you at a bay.

BAPTISTA
O, O, Petruchio! Tranio hits you now.

LUCENTIO
I thank thee for that gird, good Tranio.

HORTENSIO
Confess, confess, hath he not hit you here?

PETRUCHIO
'A has a little galled me, I confess;
And as the jest did glance away from me,
'Tis ten to one it maimed you two outright.

BAPTISTA
Now, in good sadness, son Petruchio,
I think thou hast the veriest shrew of all.

PETRUCHIO
Well, I say no. And therefore for assurance
Let's each one send unto his wife,
And he whose wife is most obedient,
To come at first when he doth send for her,
Shall win the wager which we will propose.

HORTENSIO
Content. What's the wager?

LUCENTIO
Twenty crowns.

PETRUCHIO
Twenty crowns?
I'll venture so much of my hawk or hound,
But twenty times so much upon my wife.

LUCENTIO
A hundred then.

HORTENSIO
Content.

PETRUCHIO
A match! 'Tis done.

HORTENSIO
Who shall begin?

LUCENTIO
That will I. Biondello,
Go bid your mistress come to me.

BIONDELLO
I go.
Exit

BAPTISTA
Son, I'll be your half Bianca comes.

LUCENTIO
I'll have no halves. I'll bear it all myself.
Enter Biondello
How now, what news?

BIONDELLO
Sir, my mistress sends you word
That she is busy and she cannot come.

PETRUCHIO
How? She's busy, and she cannot come!
Is that an answer?

GREMIO
Ay, and a kind one too.
Pray God, sir, your wife send you not a worse.

PETRUCHIO
I hope better.

HORTENSIO
Sirrah Biondello, go and entreat my wife
To come to me forthwith.
Exit Biondello

PETRUCHIO
O ho, entreat her!
Nay, then she must needs come.

HORTENSIO
I am afraid, sir,
Do what you can, yours will not be entreated.
Enter Biondello
Now, where's my wife?

BIONDELLO
She says you have some goodly jest in hand.
She will not come. She bids you come to her.

PETRUCHIO
Worse and worse, she will not come! O vile,
Intolerable, not to be endured!
Sirrah Grumio, go to your mistress,
Say I command her come to me.
Exit Grumio

HORTENSIO
I know her answer.

PETRUCHIO
What?

HORTENSIO
She will not.

PETRUCHIO
The fouler fortune mine, and there an end.
Enter Katherina

BAPTISTA
Now, by my holidame, here comes Katherina.

KATHERINA
What is your will, sir, that you send for me?

PETRUCHIO
Where is your sister, and Hortensio's wife?

KATHERINA
They sit conferring by the parlour fire.

PETRUCHIO
Go fetch them hither. If they deny to come,
Swinge me them soundly forth unto their husbands.
Away, I say, and bring them hither straight.
Exit Katherina

LUCENTIO
Here is a wonder, if you talk of a wonder.

HORTENSIO
And so it is. I wonder what it bodes.

PETRUCHIO
Marry, peace it bodes, and love, and quiet life,
And awful rule, and right supremacy,
And, to be short, what not that's sweet and happy.

BAPTISTA
Now fair befall thee, good Petruchio!
The wager thou hast won, and I will add
Unto their losses twenty thousand crowns –
Another dowry to another daughter,
For she is changed, as she had never been.

PETRUCHIO
Nay, I will win my wager better yet,
And show more sign of her obedience,
Her new-built virtue and obedience.
Enter Katherina with Bianca and Widow
See where she comes, and brings your froward wives
As prisoners to her womanly persuasion.
Katherine, that cap of yours becomes you not.
Off with that bauble, throw it under foot.
She obeys

WIDOW
Lord, let me never have a cause to sigh
Till I be brought to such a silly pass!

BIANCA
Fie! what a foolish duty call you this?

LUCENTIO
I would your duty were as foolish too!
The wisdom of your duty, fair Bianca,
Hath cost me a hundred crowns since supper-time.

BIANCA
The more fool you for laying on my duty.

PETRUCHIO
Katherine, I charge thee, tell these headstrong women
What duty they do owe their lords and husbands.

WIDOW
Come, come, you're mocking. We will have no telling.

PETRUCHIO
Come on, I say, and first begin with her.

WIDOW
She shall not.

PETRUCHIO
I say she shall. And first begin with her.

KATHERINA
Fie, fie, unknit that threatening unkind brow,
And dart not scornful glances from those eyes
To wound thy lord, thy king, thy governor.
It blots thy beauty as frosts do bite the meads,
Confounds thy fame as whirlwinds shake fair buds,
And in no sense is meet or amiable.
A woman moved is like a fountain troubled,
Muddy, ill-seeming, thick, bereft of beauty,
And while it is so, none so dry or thirsty
Will deign to sip or touch one drop of it.
Thy husband is thy lord, thy life, thy keeper,
Thy head, thy sovereign; one that cares for thee,
And for thy maintenance; commits his body
To painful labour both by sea and land,
To watch the night in storms, the day in cold,
Whilst thou liest warm at home, secure and safe;
And craves no other tribute at thy hands
But love, fair looks, and true obedience –
Too little payment for so great a debt.
Such duty as the subject owes the prince,
Even such a woman oweth to her husband.
And when she is froward, peevish, sullen, sour,
And not obedient to his honest will,
What is she but a foul contending rebel
And graceless traitor to her loving lord?
I am ashamed that women are so simple
To offer war where they should kneel for peace,
Or seek for rule, supremacy, and sway,
When they are bound to serve, love, and obey.
Why are our bodies soft, and weak, and smooth,
Unapt to toil and trouble in the world,
But that our soft conditions and our hearts
Should well agree with our external parts?
Come, come, you froward and unable worms,
My mind hath been as big as one of yours,
My heart as great, my reason haply more,
To bandy word for word and frown for frown.
But now I see our lances are but straws,
Our strength as weak, our weakness past compare,
That seeming to be most which we indeed least are.
Then vail your stomachs, for it is no boot,
And place your hands below your husband's foot.
In token of which duty, if he please,
My hand is ready, may it do him ease.

PETRUCHIO
Why, there's a wench! Come on, and kiss me, Kate.

LUCENTIO
Well, go thy ways, old lad, for thou shalt ha't.

VINCENTIO
'Tis a good hearing when children are toward.

LUCENTIO
But a harsh hearing when women are froward.

PETRUCHIO
Come, Kate, we'll to bed.
We three are married, but you two are sped.
(to Lucentio) 'Twas I won the wager, though you hit the white,
And being a winner, God give you good night!
Exeunt Petruchio and Katherina

HORTENSIO
Now, go thy ways, thou hast tamed a curst shrew.

LUCENTIO
'Tis a wonder, by your leave, she will be tamed so.
Exeunt
SHAKESPEARE'S WORDS © 2020 DAVID CRYSTAL & BEN CRYSTAL